Desperado (Jerod's First Tale - Finale )

Finally, the night of the finals. Marta was wearing a suitably short dress to distract any real security dudes we happen across. She claims it won't work if they happen to be girls but with that skirt, I don't know about that.

She tested the level of distraction by lifting Ted's phone before we got in the car. She gave me the nod that she'd got her target.

Yeah, I asked her to do that. If there is one thing I'm certain of, it's that Ted cannot be trusted.

Sinbad and I had rented security outfits. I think the uniform suits me.

It wasn't until we were in the car and on the move that Ginger finally found out this is the real heist. He wasn't exactly happy to find out that all of his plans were useless.

Hotel California (Jerod's First Tale - Part 9)

While I left Ginger pondering how to tackle the payroll at City Hall, Sinbad and I went to scope out the real target.

Ginger did well with choice of car. This one blends in with other cars around town, but it goes fairly well when you put your foot down.

Luckily, during the week, you can take athletic classes in the stadium. Sinbad and I went ahead and brushed up our athletics then we had a chance to have a really good look around.  We had a careful look at the ticket office, the stadium itself, various store rooms.

Heartache Tonight (Jerod's First Tale - Part 8)

I arrived in time to be treated to an argument in progress.

"Brainiac can't his hands off other people's stuff."

"Well, if you didn't hide your password in the drawer, I might not have had quite such an easy time. After all, the password wasn't the obvious imsuchadumbass, was it? Though I would have got it soon enough."

"Brawn, not brains, that's what'll get ya ahead."

New Kid in Town (Jerod's First Tale - Part 7)

Sometimes, it's the simple things in life that can make you happiest. Someone brought their baby to the park and left it just sitting there.

Such a cute little tyke. All alone. Unprotected. Mine to have fun with.

You have fun your way and I'll have fun mine. Stealing candy from an unsuspecting toddler is a lot of fun. The results are one upset toddler screaming its little lungs out and I have some great candy.

"Hey, Red, got some news for you." It was Sinbad Rotter. "I've been looking for you everywhere."

"What's up, 'Bad?"

"Couple of things. The Company got tired of waiting for Dennis Racket to return so they've fired his ass. Till they decide who's running our branch, we're taking orders from the Company head office."

I nodded, that made sense. Dennis was senior most employee in town, almost everyone else has been happy drifting along like the two bit thieves they are.

"The other thing is that there's a new kid in town. The Company has decided to assign him to be your getaway man. You two have a lot in common."

"Sinbad, there is no way I'm shepherding the new kid. I am not the company babysitter."

"Not your choice, chum. The Company has decided to start pairing off people quickly, it gives the noobs someone to look up to and you have incentive to teach them well."

"I do?"

"Cops ain't gonna just take your offsider in, are they? He's over at the Red Rendezvous, you should go meet him."

"Well, how am I going to recognise him?"

Sinbad laughed. "Red, you'll know him when you see him."

Well, Sinbad was right. In a tiny town like this, any new face stands out. That honker of his stands out by a mile.

But it is annoying to find that the company is so shallow, they'll assign another red-head to me just because we are 'so much alike'.

"I'm Ted. Ted Ginger," he told me. Right, his real last name is Ginger *exactly* as much as mine is Shrimpton.

"I'm Jerod, but most everyone calls me Shrimp."

"They told me I had to start as your driver. Do you think we should convince the company to invest in some super-charged V6 cars or would standard V8s do? Cars aren't normally my concern."

They aren't mine either. Do they go faster than the cop cars? That's the only point that's really going to matter. What kind of guy did they set me up with?

"Mainly, don't get something too flashy. It's not nearly a big enough town to hide a flashy car. And it needs to be able to hit top speed pretty quickly. Beyond that," I shrugged.

"Come on, you have to care. We need to make waves in the Company. Big waves. Waves that I can ride to the top."

"Waves you can ride to the top?"

"Yes, someday this town will be mine. This town and beyond," he cackled with glee.

He is more like me than I realised. He's an evil bastard bent on ruling as much of the world as he can hold.

Since I was already at the Red Rendezvous, I arranged for another band get together.

We still haven't been offered an official gig but we make damn fine music together.

During our break, I went over to get to know MJ better. She wasn't impressed when she found out that I was evil.

So MJ is yet another Ms Goody Goody chick. What is it with all the cute chicks in town being good?

Hot damn. Dennis's hot tub finally arrived. They've installed it upstairs here, along with a bit of screening.

I can forgive Dennis a lot for this. I finally can try out skinny dipping in the hot tub.

Well, I can forgive him some. I'm still glad that I managed to avoid kissing him, much less sleeping with him. And the pink tux was godawful in every sense.

Tania and Tatianna joined me. What more can a guy ask for then skinny dipping with two girls?

"Ted, what are you doing?"

"Can't let you hog all the ladies in town, can I?"

I was about to protest when Tania made room for Ted by sliding over next to me. Niiccee.

Tania started to cuddle and everything else in the room faded to insignificance. Let Ted have Tatianna. They deserve each other.

"Shrimp?"

I turned my head toward her. "Yes? What do you..." She took advantage of me and gave me a kiss I wasn't going to forget in a hurry. My Ms Goody Goody is damn fine at making out. That woman can take advantage of me any time she wants.

I told Tania we should talk when I got back from my trip. But I can't just bring myself to just ask her to move out of the house. I tried an indirect approach.

"Tania, why the hell can't you clean anything? You've cooked like once and the stove is filthy, the counter is disgusting and there are dishes everywhere."

"What on earth is your problem, Shrimp? What's a few dirty dishes? And I seriously don't know what you mean about the stove or the counter. It all looks fine to me."

"My problem is that it stinks in here. The cloud of flies doesn't give you a clue that it's getting bad?"

"Eh, if you don't like it, you can clean it. I have better things to worry about."

So far, so good. She's quite insulted.

So much for the indirect approach. One minute we are fighting and the next minute, well, let's just say that makeup sex can be everything that it's promised to be.

Insulting Tania is not going to encourage either of us to move on. It always ends with us diving into bed again.

The band isn't getting gigs as a group but as individuals, we are making some money on the side from our efforts. I was at City Hall to do a drum roll for the mayor. She was announcing a new tax for the businesses around the city.

I did my bit, the mayor did hers to much cheering and applause. She handed me 500 simoleons since the announcement went so well.

I found out that Dennis had left behind a recommendation that I get promoted. It's kind of impressive how much he was willing to do for his toy boy-to-be; trip, promotion, hot tub.

Almost enough to make me regret having him kidnapped from camp. Not quite, but nearly.

I was outside, working on my latest masterpiece.

When Tania answered the front door and found that Sinbad and Ted have dropped by for a visit. I wonder what they want.

Already Gone (Jerod's First Tale - Part 6)

I don't know which is uglier, the snake in the basket or the snake trying to lay on some charm.

That's unfair. The snake in the basket is actually quite a handsome animal. Unlike the other.

"Hey, Den, party time. You wanna help me down some drinks?"

"Cold drink in this hot climate sounds like just the thing."

One of These Nights (Jerod's First Tale - Part 5)

Well, it took a couple of days of paperwork but I got the documents I need to travel overseas. I let Dennis know and the tickets for the trip arrived later in the day. There was a note with the tickets. It simply said, "You promised to be good."

Getting the tickets was nice. Very nice indeed. I love it when an evil plan comes together. I did promise to be good, Mr Racket, however I don't think you noticed the except clause.

I was getting ready to meet up with Tania at the Red Rendezvous. It seems to be 'our' place and I couldn't possibly go away without letting her know.

"Hey Sweetie, I'm going away for a few days."

"Really?"

"Yeah, it's sort of work related."

"How long and where?"

"Only a few days, and um," I thought about it. Truth or lie?  Lie, she might tell someone that I was overseas. I don't want a soul to know that I was anywhere near Egypt. "China. Just a little bit of business in China. Nothing big, just being a courier for a special package."

"Wow, that's great."

"So, you know, don't do anything I wouldn't do while I'm away."

"What would you do with yourself if I left?"

"Let's see. Booze, dance, brawl, play drums and date at least half a dozen women."

"You silly. You wouldn't date women behind my back."

"Tania, I'm really not the guy you must think I am. Cause I totally would. You need to get out more and meet a nice guy."

"If you'd date other women, why haven't I heard about it yet?"

"Too busy boozing, dancing, playing drums and brawling to date around. It's on my to-do list."

"Come on Shrimp. Stop exaggerating and tell the truth."

I must be getting truly fond of this chick. Because I don't want to hide from her any more. I want her to know that I have an evil side. "Seriously, Tan, when I get back from this trip, we should talk." 

"I'll miss you heaps while you're gone."

"It's not for long, Sweetie. I'll be back before you know what happened."

-----

It was a long flight but we are finally here.

Egypt, land of mystery and monuments. Dennis tried but failed to get a hotel. Apparently, the company prefers to do business in tiny towns at the edge of the map. Campsites are the only accommodation available.

Looks a bit primitive but there is eating facilities, cheap tents and

Oh yes, a bar. Thank god, I know I'm going to need a few stiff drinks.

 My new outfit, courtesy of some of Dennis's travel money.

"No wonder you're called Shrimpy. When was the last time you had a decent meal? Last month?"

"Den, that leather jacket is going to kill you in this heat."

"I'll risk it. Better that then exposing the legs to too much sun."

We went over to the town centre. Dennis wanted to buy a few things before we went off and did the tourist stuff for the morning.

Dennis finished his transactions and we did a bit of sightseeing. First was the sphinx.

God, it's huge. It isn't until you walk between the paws that you get a true appreciation of the scale.

"Are you happy, pretty boy?"

"It's pretty amazing to be here, Den" I let him grab my hands. "Did you tell anyone that you had a companion on this trip."

"I've told no one that I was paying for a second ticket. You?"

"No one in Twinbrook knows that I'm spending the time here with you." Thank god for that.

Yes, this time, I let him touch my face.

"Shrimpy, you are a good boy, aren't you?"

"I did promise, Den. And you did buy the tickets."

Our next stop was the Great Pyramid. Again, the scale was unbelievable. Even the entrance made you feel quite insignificant.

Since there was no one around, Dennis decided he wanted a hug. I was very happy to cooperate with that.

He was satisfied with the hug and I was satisfied that I got his wallet and travel documents. Score, he had 9,000 in cash with him. I could do a lot with that kind of money.

Here I was, at the Great Pyramid. Who knows when an opportunity like this may come up again. I really wanted to get in there. See the interior of this amazing place.

It took some time but I eventually found a switch that activated the door.

I made it in.

Woah, from the number of skeletons, getting out again was tricky at some point. I didn't wander far, I wasn't prepared to seriously explore a place like that.

Dennis only had the morning for touring. He had appointments all afternoon to keep him busy with company business. That was fine by me, I had a few things to take care of.

I had the names of a few useful contacts in the town. I was given the names via a few old friends of mine that were once in the business.

"I was wondering if you knew some people who might be willing to ... help .. me for a price."

"What sort of help?"

"Well, I'm setting up a joke. I need some men to take my friend to a tomb well away from town and leave him there."

"That could prove fatal. Fatal is expensive."

"I'll pay for a cache of food and water too. Enough for a week. That way, there shouldn't be a fatality."

"A week? Ok, I know some men that would be willing to arrange that. But it won't be cheap."

"Of course not. You have to arrange transport, the supplies, etc. Would a thousand simoleons serve?"

"That would be an insult to my people. Three thousand simoleons and not a cent less."

"I offer two thousand."

"Done."

I smiled to myself. Two thousand to remove Dennis from the scene and it will be his cash that pays for it. Such a sweet deal.

My second contact was equally important.

"I understand that you run the department that issues new papers for travelers who have lost their current ones?"

"Yes, that is my job."

"I was wondering if I could persuade you to delay issuing papers to a friend of mine. His wife wants to plan a surprise and she needs several weeks to get the workmen around to finish off the new home extension she's planning."

"Sir, my job is to provide replacements promptly and efficiently."

"Perhaps 500 would convince you to lose the paperwork for awhile?"

"Make it 1000 and I shall lose the paperwork twice over for you."

"Excellent. Here are the full details of my friend." I gave her his name, address, next of kin, etc. Dennis will get back to town, eventually, only to find it very difficult to replace his stolen documents. 

Tonight. The guys will be by tonight. I'll need to get things ready for them.